.I'm misunderstand with my life.

warning : do not translate this if you hate it :')

my head says that i want to commit suicidethat's all i ever wanted in my life
i don't want to be exist anymore
cause i can feel everything bad if i lived
i am a stupid person
i makes many mistakes and problem
because i don't know that you hate me because of my stupid behavior
like anybody else
everyone hates each other
including me
help who ever can help this neverending problem
maybe i could wish something good from God
it's true
but i want it to be done now
i hate this
please help
i am such a different person
i am so different
i'm stupider than anybody else
i'm still scared by my childhood
it feels like my hands stick with bad people that i thought it was devil in my head
like handcuffed
i think i makes many sins and i guess it wasn't even possible to me to do good things to make God happy for me
don't worry it's just a feeling
but maybe it's true
maybe what i want is not bad stuffs
but happinness
so i need to find everything that makes me calm down
not to stress every time
and i need to make myself clean
i mean from sins and everything bad
and physichaly too
i want everything
i wanna do everything i love even if it's bad or complicated
if anyone flames and blames
idc
YOLO is my choice
my phrase
i do what i want
my life is full of adventure
i want to try everything
i still don't understand every thing
but it's okay
i don't know that you hate me because of my stupid behavior
i'm really sorry for everything i did
i want to do everything good
i will fight the bad stuffs
where's my Griffindor bravery
i won't give up


if everyone hates
the only one who i don't hate was God